Fun fact #1: my nickname is mich/miche (my friends all spell it differently).
Fun fact #2: I am not religious.
Okay let’s begin.
I did it. I actually did it…without even realizing. I got to that point I’ve always wanted to get to. Growing up, did you ever have a vision of an ideal you? I goal for who you wanted to be, how you wanted to speak, what you wanted to know? Well I did. I wanted to know about people.. how they think. I wanted to have an adequate vocabulary to properly communicate the weird philosophical thoughts I was having to other people (and to myself for that matter). I wanted to be a leader, someone in charge. Someone who runs the show.
And I honestly think I did it. Well, at least– I’m doing it. I’m the person I wanted to be when I was growing up, and that makes me incredibly happy.
I realized this on the train today, (right now, actually). I was just watching this video about this boy who had this horrible disease and was trying to fundraise money for his next surgery (cutest kid on earth, by the way). And he was saying how “god made us the way we were supposed to be made”. And that got me thinking about religion. I’ve been an atheist my entire life and I was trying to think of my own faith. What do I have faith in? Who the hell do I pray to..
Well, as cheesy as it sounds.. I kind of have faith in myself. In my own decisions. Without even consciously trying to become this person I always dreamed of being, I made the decisions and took the risks I needed to in order to get here [here being a second-year psychology student passionately involved in the things that made me happy]. And that makes sense right? When you want something, you try to get it. It’s like that thing that all of your decisions are grounded by. That thing that pushes you to go for opportunities that can get you to where you want to be.
I’m also now considering this weird, dark, freudian-y theory that even some of the bad parts of ourselves, we want to be there, (somewhere, deep deep down). Come to think of it, I kind of love my impatience. It gets me places and allows me to be proactive. And I kind of love that I question myself and my weird thoughts all the time. Keeps me grounded and keeps me thinking.
So, anywho. That’s my ‘mich religion’. I find reassurance and spiritual fulfilment in the idea that I will get to where I want to be on my own. No matter what. Everything will work out in favour of my best interest. The “life obstacles” and crap is all just bumps in this conquest of self.
Believe in your own potential, and have faith in yourself.
– Dose of Delight