I feel so strangely happy today. I’ve felt quite strangely happy most days, recently. Even in the midst of midterms and being hella single on Valentine’s Day, I’ve managed to remain ridiculously happy and full of life (with obvious minor exceptions.. hehe). Every day feels inspiring and everything I do feels worthwhile. Even sitting here in the library, working on a philosophy essay, feels enjoyable to me.
It’s really all about the outlook you have on things, I’ve learned. School would suck if I were merely doing it for good grades, just as food would suck if I were just eating to fuel my body with nutrients. It’s also about your company: part of the reason I’ve been so happy is grace to the people I surround myself with, and the way I spend time with myself. When we are alone, we aren’t without anyone. We are simply with ourself. But we are still a person, we have thoughts, and we need to learn how to properly hang out with ourselves. Don’t get lost in that head of yours.
Take the time to get out: go skating, go out for spontaneous dinners with your best friends, hit up 90s night at your favourite local bar, (this has been my life these past couple weeks). Sure, in the mornings I try to work out, I try to meditate, I try to get work done, but these activities have become purposeful and fulfilling to me. They aren’t just mandatory chores. It’s all about balance, ya know? Going to the library for 10 hours straight just doesn’t feel totally fun for me without a lunch break or tea date.
We studied a philosopher called Nietzsche in my Existentialism class this week, where I learned an important little lesson. Well, one of many… that class has inspired me in several ways. Imagine you were told you would have to relive all of the moments in your life for all eternity – the deaths of loved ones, the stresses of getting into university or finding a job, the heartbreaks. Most people would be daunted by this idea and would never wish to relive some of their most negative moments, even most of the meaningless ones as well.
Nietzsche suggests that we live each moment as such that we will be reliving them for all eternity. Don’t quote me on that, but that’s what I took from our 1 hour intro lecture on him. My obvious initial reaction was, “that’s ridiculous, how can we find joy in the grieving of our loved ones.” But, it’s more about concept of the idea rather than the practical execution. In any case, this kind of resonated with me. Sometimes it’s the most ordinarily meaningless moments that light me up. The bus rides home from night class, staring out into the snowy darkness with music flooding through my headphones, dreaming about a boy or that time in first-year when we when tobogganing down UC hill on cafeteria trays, laughing our heads off.
Moral of the story: don’t waste the mundane, don’t wallow in the negative, and try to savour the bliss. And again, don’t get lost in that head of yours.
– Dose of Delight